For some it may be fairly easy to let go. While for others it takes quite a bit more effort. I fall into the last of these two categories. For the past 5 months, I have experienced one of the most dreadful situations someone can encounter. The murder of a family member, in this case my sister.
It isn't just the shock of losing my eldest sister, it wasn't because we had built up a 25 yr old wall between us -- neither of us speaking to one another, for me it was because aside from all this, someone willingly took her life by choice. For me the hard part of letting go was the anger, I was unprepared.
Up until a few weeks ago I was consumed most days of how I would exact revenge on not just the man, but on any remaining members of his immediate family. I wanted him to know how this pain felt. For me the several month journey was in bad company, everyday.
All the while God was sending forth those who could help me, I was just as busy pushing them away, too blinded by the rage I felt inside. Too short sighted to see the blessing he had given the rest of us if we would just open our eyes. Open our hearts to his comfort, his love for us.
A very good friend, finally gave me the last piece of advice I needed to hear on the matter. Nothing I can do from this point on will bring her back to life or change the tragic ending to her life. Punishment on this earth is up to those in law enforcement and the courts, but know this now that a much higher court of accountability lays in store for each and everyone of us, the court of God.
Basically it goes something like this, if I do not distance myself from this and truely forgive and forget this man's trespasses against my sister and her children, then where does this leave me. I am guilty of the same, robbing God of his gift of forgiveness.
Forgiveness sets free the anger from within, which entraps my ability to forgive the smaller day to day things that we are all mostly guilty of; cutting someone off in traffic, or getting angry at someone who made us mad at work, or maybe it was our spouse who doesn't seem to understand us. Everything seems to get added in.
Rather than concentrating on what the problem is or where it is at, I find the better solution for me, is to concentrate on where the answer is. To turn our attention to the voice of our shepard, his words heal the hurt, calm the stormy sea that rages around us, encourages us, loves us, unconditionally, no matter how far or near we stray, a great celebration is at hand when we entrust ourselves to the hands of our shepard.
Society as we once knew it no longer exists with its civility towards one another, moral decay has eroded most of what we knew growing up or which commonly existed in the old neighborhoods, not even our church communities have escaped the decay.
It's never too late to turn our eyes toward our shepard, slow down and take his hand, feel the comfort and security, know the power of their love in all its abundence. Anger is an energy robber, steals all breath from all endeavors, work, home, or recreation. Turn your ears towards the horn of our savior, he is calling us.
No longer consumed by anger, no longer a slave to being mad at everything, being mindful that there will always be temptations, I do not have be a victem to them, I have a choice to take ahold of my shepards hand and go in peace or wage war with a dead man.
Sunday, January 8, 2012
Wednesday, October 5, 2011
Watch Your Language
During my time as a firefighter, we had terms for just about every type of emergency when alerting other firefighters; for instance, when there was an aircraft emergency it was either a ground emergency or an in flight emergency depended if the plane was flying or not, while others emergencies we not necessarily as easy to know such as Structural Emergencies or a High Angle Rescue.
Sometimes we are just as confusing in the way and choice of words we use when praying. Not that God can't understand us, good thing he does, but folks sometimes feel like they need a special language or words or even phrases to speak with God, this is simply not the case. I personally don't buy that.God is a great conversationalist. He isn't distracted by other things going on around him, he is focusing on your every word. He listens to every word we say.
In firefighting, you learn quickly to respect the lines of communication, if they break down trouble will follow quickly, sometimes with deadly consequences. No need for fancy call signs or terms either, make it simple and to the point, much are prays should be. Same goes with God, if we disrespect him, we take our chances, foolish us.
The second part of praying is listening, being patient, God purpose for us doesn't always mean we will understand his answer. He goes to great lengths to reach out to the few sometimes. Have you ever wondered if you are the only one praying?
Try these couple of simple solutions the next time you want to speak or pray with the Lord.
-- Find a quiet place, no outside distractions if possible.
-- God delights in those who are faithful, take time each day to speak with God, he will listen.
-- Be careful not to dismiss what seems like unanswered prayers. Be patient, his answer may just surprise you.
-- Find delight and privilege in your time with him. It's by his grace we take our next breath.
I hope you'll find this advice helpful. We have to consistently focus on his word each and everyday, not just on the bad or challenging days, but on the great days as well. Why not start off your day on a great foot tomorrow morning by having a talk with the creator of the universe and heavens above?
Sometimes we are just as confusing in the way and choice of words we use when praying. Not that God can't understand us, good thing he does, but folks sometimes feel like they need a special language or words or even phrases to speak with God, this is simply not the case. I personally don't buy that.God is a great conversationalist. He isn't distracted by other things going on around him, he is focusing on your every word. He listens to every word we say.
In firefighting, you learn quickly to respect the lines of communication, if they break down trouble will follow quickly, sometimes with deadly consequences. No need for fancy call signs or terms either, make it simple and to the point, much are prays should be. Same goes with God, if we disrespect him, we take our chances, foolish us.
The second part of praying is listening, being patient, God purpose for us doesn't always mean we will understand his answer. He goes to great lengths to reach out to the few sometimes. Have you ever wondered if you are the only one praying?
Try these couple of simple solutions the next time you want to speak or pray with the Lord.
-- Find a quiet place, no outside distractions if possible.
-- God delights in those who are faithful, take time each day to speak with God, he will listen.
-- Be careful not to dismiss what seems like unanswered prayers. Be patient, his answer may just surprise you.
-- Find delight and privilege in your time with him. It's by his grace we take our next breath.
I hope you'll find this advice helpful. We have to consistently focus on his word each and everyday, not just on the bad or challenging days, but on the great days as well. Why not start off your day on a great foot tomorrow morning by having a talk with the creator of the universe and heavens above?
Friday, September 2, 2011
It's All My Fault
Has to be someones right? Someone is always to blame for someone or something or some situation, right? Assigning blame is part of overcoming the problem, part of the healing process, part of gaining peace, right? right?
Did the world become a better place for those that murdered Jesus? Did their lives improve, did they overcome their problems, their vast riches increase? After all didn't the world deserve to be happy once someone was blamed and crucified?
How many times during our week do we feel compelled to assigned blame for something or to someone for our misfortunes or woes, our struggles? Better to know who is right and wrong? We sleep better knowing we gave them a lecture on how miserable their life is because of them messing something up, it was their fault after all and don't begin to use that we are human excuse with me !!! right?
How about we back up and look inwardly at ourselves first, judge the other person after judging ourselves, find fault after admitting our own shortcomings, let us remove the plank from our own eye before we pick at the splinter in the others eye. I know, I can't be serious, after all who lives their life like that anyway.
Well Jesus did, yep not saying anyone of us can come close to him, if it were not for his actions, we are all dead, not just dead but really dead, dead to God, dead to his grace, dead to his love, dead to the coming kingdom, dead to eternal life, dead to it all, fine if you want to follow satan and not God.
Let's try it this way, life on this plant stinks sometimes, it's hard to get through some days, hard to work through complex issues, hard to understand why you have to struggle, easy to love God, easy to try and live a life worthy of him who has forgiven us of all our faults, our shortcomings, our stupidity.
Do you find it easier to curse someone than to love someone? Do you find life so unbearable and your life so difficult you can hardly get through the day? Do you find yourself angry?
• Hatred has its roots starting in Genesis, Cain murdered Abel. He could have chosen to love his brother and be proud of his accomplishments rather than curse him for his own failures or to better yet turn to God to obtain his answers. Sometimes the question of why something is a failure or fails us it's because we are looking the wrong way or angry about our own failures and take it out on someone else.
o There is good and bad anger; Good anger acts then forgives, does not keep score of past wrongs or failures. -- Psa 103:9 and 1 Cor 13:5
• Despair to Praise. Hard to find the words to respond to someone when all seems lost or when anything good does not seem possible. Lets consider King David for the moment. He felt abandoned, completely alone and helpless, ridiculed for his faith, taunted by his enemies, surrounded by those who would kill him, utterly drained and on the verge of death.
o In Psalm 22:1-18 He cries out in his despa, casting himself upon the grace of God he was able to praise God before himself, his family, his country and the world and came back to claim victory for God was with him, just as Job is spared so was he who cast himself before the Lord our God in repentance and faith. There are other examples as well, ranging from Ruth to Daniel to Peter and Paul. Cast your fears and failures before our God for he has concurred all.
Anger and despair are like thieves in the night, stealing happiness and joy, leaving despair and frustration in their wake. Much can be said about this subject and even entire books have been devoted to them. In the end all that should matter is our ultimate relationship with God our father. He knows our heart better than we know it ourselves, he knows when it will be tempted and by whom.
The course of actions we take are all ours, he provides the opportunity to go one way or the other, sometimes easier to swim downstream than upwards against the current where fear and doubt lay in wait to trip us up. Do not be fooled into thinking you are anything less than someone created in his own image, loved dearly by him, you have worth, you have value, you have purpose.
Do not let the sun set on your anger or your dispare, do not fear satan he can't touch you, you belong to God and he hates that. He may control the physical nature of this world, but has nothing on the world yet to come or on God's chosen. Do not let the thought of fault creep into your day, God has already forgiven your sins and shortcomings, God will judge us as we judge others.
If you are finding yourself scratching your head for more information and bible verses or just examining your own life more closely as a result of this blog, it really isn't my fault...
Did the world become a better place for those that murdered Jesus? Did their lives improve, did they overcome their problems, their vast riches increase? After all didn't the world deserve to be happy once someone was blamed and crucified?
How many times during our week do we feel compelled to assigned blame for something or to someone for our misfortunes or woes, our struggles? Better to know who is right and wrong? We sleep better knowing we gave them a lecture on how miserable their life is because of them messing something up, it was their fault after all and don't begin to use that we are human excuse with me !!! right?
How about we back up and look inwardly at ourselves first, judge the other person after judging ourselves, find fault after admitting our own shortcomings, let us remove the plank from our own eye before we pick at the splinter in the others eye. I know, I can't be serious, after all who lives their life like that anyway.
Well Jesus did, yep not saying anyone of us can come close to him, if it were not for his actions, we are all dead, not just dead but really dead, dead to God, dead to his grace, dead to his love, dead to the coming kingdom, dead to eternal life, dead to it all, fine if you want to follow satan and not God.
Let's try it this way, life on this plant stinks sometimes, it's hard to get through some days, hard to work through complex issues, hard to understand why you have to struggle, easy to love God, easy to try and live a life worthy of him who has forgiven us of all our faults, our shortcomings, our stupidity.
Do you find it easier to curse someone than to love someone? Do you find life so unbearable and your life so difficult you can hardly get through the day? Do you find yourself angry?
• Hatred has its roots starting in Genesis, Cain murdered Abel. He could have chosen to love his brother and be proud of his accomplishments rather than curse him for his own failures or to better yet turn to God to obtain his answers. Sometimes the question of why something is a failure or fails us it's because we are looking the wrong way or angry about our own failures and take it out on someone else.
o There is good and bad anger; Good anger acts then forgives, does not keep score of past wrongs or failures. -- Psa 103:9 and 1 Cor 13:5
• Despair to Praise. Hard to find the words to respond to someone when all seems lost or when anything good does not seem possible. Lets consider King David for the moment. He felt abandoned, completely alone and helpless, ridiculed for his faith, taunted by his enemies, surrounded by those who would kill him, utterly drained and on the verge of death.
o In Psalm 22:1-18 He cries out in his despa, casting himself upon the grace of God he was able to praise God before himself, his family, his country and the world and came back to claim victory for God was with him, just as Job is spared so was he who cast himself before the Lord our God in repentance and faith. There are other examples as well, ranging from Ruth to Daniel to Peter and Paul. Cast your fears and failures before our God for he has concurred all.
Anger and despair are like thieves in the night, stealing happiness and joy, leaving despair and frustration in their wake. Much can be said about this subject and even entire books have been devoted to them. In the end all that should matter is our ultimate relationship with God our father. He knows our heart better than we know it ourselves, he knows when it will be tempted and by whom.
The course of actions we take are all ours, he provides the opportunity to go one way or the other, sometimes easier to swim downstream than upwards against the current where fear and doubt lay in wait to trip us up. Do not be fooled into thinking you are anything less than someone created in his own image, loved dearly by him, you have worth, you have value, you have purpose.
Do not let the sun set on your anger or your dispare, do not fear satan he can't touch you, you belong to God and he hates that. He may control the physical nature of this world, but has nothing on the world yet to come or on God's chosen. Do not let the thought of fault creep into your day, God has already forgiven your sins and shortcomings, God will judge us as we judge others.
If you are finding yourself scratching your head for more information and bible verses or just examining your own life more closely as a result of this blog, it really isn't my fault...
Sunday, August 28, 2011
Goodnight Nightingale
Goodnight sweet nightingale, your journey here is done, how tragic the way the end found you.
Your voice once caressed and soothed, your heart beating so loudly.
Although distanced due to pride and stubbornness, you were not the only one who let things come between us.
I held your hand as they made it official, nothing more for them to do. How tragic the circumstances.
Why did we ever let things come so unraveled, so frayed, history and judgement will not be easy for any of us to bear.
Father our creator in heaven, knows the answers, knows the why, knows they who, knows the truth none seemingly want to face. Stupid pride, arrogance.
Goodnight Nightingale....sing at peace with the father in heaven, your day is done here.
Your voice once caressed and soothed, your heart beating so loudly.
Although distanced due to pride and stubbornness, you were not the only one who let things come between us.
I held your hand as they made it official, nothing more for them to do. How tragic the circumstances.
Why did we ever let things come so unraveled, so frayed, history and judgement will not be easy for any of us to bear.
Father our creator in heaven, knows the answers, knows the why, knows they who, knows the truth none seemingly want to face. Stupid pride, arrogance.
Goodnight Nightingale....sing at peace with the father in heaven, your day is done here.
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